When we asked Berkens which emotion was the most difficult to control, she had a quick response:shame, The shame is great.”
As she tells MindBodyGreen, she has seen countless people in her work who are stuck for long periods of time in what she calls “a shame.” Without realizing it, she notes, people caught in a shame spiral have identified with their shame, internalized it and colored their perception with it.
“I think shame is the most difficult emotion for people to deal with because it’s so deeply rooted. It’s an insidious emotion because it involves so many things—it’s not like fear or joy or embarrassment. Shame is rooted in many aspects of how someone sees and feels about themselves and other people, and how they make sense of things that have happened to them,” explains Berkens.
And not only that, but shyness is just as difficult to understand as it is to open up. “It’s hard for people to even realize what they’re struggling with,” she says, “it’s really something that most people—in some way , shape or form—are struggling, whether they realize it or not.”
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